The plot’s simple. Mercenaries attempt to liberate small island where fascist regime holds dominion. Something happens with a double-cross and no-one cares Someone tries to be funny and no-one cares. Someone tries to have a love interest and no-one cares. That’s about it.
Stallone tries his hardest, bless him, to direct while obviously not knowing what day he’s on. The soundtrack (“Mississippi Queen” by Mountain, in case you were wondering) tells you what he was going for, but that’s the only time he manages it. And the rest is just half-assed. Give him his due, though, he knows how to blow stuff up. He’s good at that. But none of the explosions had be grinning or hooked like the A-Team
The communal toilets led to many philosophical shits during shooting.
The acting is what you’d expect. That is, none existent. We weren’t expecting much but something would have been preferable. As it is, the only moments that pay off come, surprisingly, from Jason Statham. He appears genuine throughout the whole film, lifting the other actors when he gets chance. He’s actually funny too, although you get the impression that he’s just being himself. But the only true moment of acting belongs to Mickey Rourke. He’s so good that even Stallone can’t help but react convincingly to his character. That’s bloody impressive.
Arnie’s cameo is limp. Bruce Willis is hammered by a shitty script. We know he can act, so it isn’t Bruce’s fault.
I’m finding it hard to say anything of worth about this movie. Did I mention Statham was pretty good? Oh, I did? Sorry.
What about Giselle Itié? She’s pretty good. Although couldn’t bring herself to kiss Stallone before he leaves. Can’t blame her.
That’s about it. Weak all the way through. Action: seen worse but could have been better. Acting: need I say more? Overall: a bit tosh.
“Go watch your old favourites again. Play ‘Drink along with Predator’.”